
Was that a wild inauguration day or what? At one point, Americans turned on their TVs to find the newly sworn-in president doing his signature Trump YMCA dance while waving around a cavalry sword. We are SO BACK, baby!
President Donald Trump delivered three speeches on inauguration day and attended three inaugural balls that evening. The speeches were great, as Trump’s speeches always are. But it was the flurry of action that took place all day long that really mattered.
America’s real president gave a 90-minute press conference from the Oval Office while signing dozens of executive orders. He continually fielded questions on every topic under the sun while also signing the new orders. That’s something that Joe Biden was never capable of doing over the last four years.
President Trump signed 78 executive orders Monday that directly overturned some of Joe Biden’s crappiest policies. He shut down Joe Biden’s CBP One mobile app and canceled the immigration appointments of 20,000 illegal aliens waiting to get into the country.
The same media outlets that ignored the border crisis for four years immediately found some crying foreign woman and shoved the cameras in her face as she was crying. Boo-hoo! Go home, lady! We’re full!
Trump abolished the federal government’s insane anchor baby policy. That eliminates a major incentive for both legal and illegal aliens to scam our system to their own benefit. That policy has been so abused that Chinese generals send their mistresses on “birthing vacations” to the United States, so they can give birth to a dual-citizenship baby who will be raised back in Communist China.
More than 400,000 anchor babies were born in the United States in 2024 and were granted automatic American citizenship. The new Trump policy goes into effect in 30 days.
Every past president of the 21st century has threatened to designate the drug cartels as foreign terrorist organizations. Mexico’s government always shamed them into not doing it. They know that a terrorist designation will lead to direct military action against the cartels on Mexican soil. That terrorist designation is now official, as Trump signed the executive order on Monday.
Trump noted that the drug cartels have been killing as many as 300,000 Americans with drugs every year (far more than the 100,000 that the media always claims). He also refused to rule out military action against the cartels.
And speaking of the military, Trump signed an executive order to send troops to completely seal our borders against illegal entry. Sadly, amidst the celebratory atmosphere on inauguration day, an illegal alien who crossed the Canadian border into Vermont shot and killed a Border Patrol agent.
Trump also withdrew the US from the World Health Organization and the Paris global warming treaty. He also banned any additional offshore wind leases in the Outer Continental Shelf. No more whale-killing windmills under the Trump administration!
He ordered emergency price relief for the American people, starting with reducing energy costs by extracting our nation’s cheap and abundant oil and natural gas. All federal agencies are now tasked with taking measures to reduce prices for the American people, particularly in housing. This will entail expanding the housing supply, eliminating rent-seeking practices, and abolishing all “climate” policies and regulations that raise the costs of household appliances, food, and energy.
President Trump eliminated diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) hiring practices. The federal government will now go back to hiring federal employees based on merit, rather than on their skin color or how weird their sex lives are on the weekends. Not that there will be much federal hiring going on for a while. In another executive order, Trump instituted a hiring freeze for all federal civilian employees.
All foreign aid is now suspended until further notice. Too bad, Zelensky!
Starting immediately, the federal government only recognizes the two valid sexes—male and female. The TikTok ban is on hold for 75 days now, to provide Trump the time to try to negotiate a deal for a 50% American ownership stake. Mount McKinley’s proper name has been restored. Maps will have to be updated to correctly recognize the Gulf of America.
True to his word, President Trump issued full and unconditional pardons for more than 1,500 January 6 political hostages and commuted several additional sentences.
So much winning! We are SO BACK, America!
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