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Wow! Look at All These Lucky Congressional Stock Pickers’ Returns for 2023!

If you want to know why Members of Congress seem so unconcerned that 60% of Americans no longer have a savings account, you should know that it’s because Congress had another banner year in the stock market. Talk about a bunch of lucky stock pickers!

Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) always catches a lot of flak because of her fortunate stock picks, but she’s not the only one who deserves the tar-and-feathers treatment. There were eight Members of Congress who out-invested Pelosi in 2023, and a total of 32 Representatives and Senators who outperformed the S&P500. Let’s name some names!

First, here are a few baseline numbers for comparison. The composite average of all mutual funds in 2023 was 7% growth. The absolute best-performing mutual funds realized a 10-year average of 16.5% growth for 2023. All 500 of the companies in the S&P500 realized an average growth of 24.8% in 2023, largely because of the Ukraine war.

32 Members of Congress—both Republicans and Democrats—outdid the S&P500 on their stock picks in 2023. One Democrat made a gob-stopping 238.9% return on his 2023 stock picks (we’ll name him below and recommend criminal charges).

 

Okay, here we go. We’re naming names, and keep in mind that these “alleged” crooks all somehow magically outperformed the S&P500 in 2023.

* Rep. John Curtis (R-UT) – 25.3%
* Rep. Josh Gottheimer (D-NJ) – 25.4%
* Rep. Mikie Sherrill (D-NJ) – 25.9%
* Rep. Chuck Fleischmann (R-TN) – 28.3%
* Rep. Kathy Manning (D-NC) – 33.4%
* Sen. Tina Smith (D-MN) – 35.4%
* Rep. Daniel Meuser (R-PA) – 36.3%
* Rep. Dan Crenshaw (R-TX) – 38.2%

(As if we needed another reason to hate “Eyepatch McCain.”)

* Sen. Markwayne Mullen (R-OK) – 40.1%
* Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse (D-RI) – 41.1%

Seriously? Sheldon Whitehouse is the second-dumbest member of the US Senate. I’d give him 50-50 odds in a game of Tiddlywinks against Mazie Hirono. Yet he somehow picked stocks that gained 41.1% in 2023.

* Rep. Deborah Ross (D-NC) – 46.1%
* Rep. Jonathan Jackson (D-IL) – 47%
* Rep. Dan Newhouse (R-WA) – 47.3%
* Rep. Doug Lamborn (R-CO) – 49%
* Rep. David Kustoff (R-TN) – 50.3%

* Rep. Daniel Goldman (D-NY) – 52.8%

For those who don’t remember, Goldman was the lead attorney for House Democrats during both failed impeachment attempts against President Donald Trump. Goldman rode that “fame” into a congressional seat in 2022. He’s only been in Congress for a couple of years, and he more than doubled the performance of the S&P500 last year with his “lucky” stock picks.

* Rep. Ed Case (D-HI) – 53.2%
* Rep. Suzan DelBene (D-WA) – 53.7%
* Rep. Robert Aderholt (R-LA) – 54%
* Sen. Susan Collins (R-ME) – 55.5%
* Sen. Dan Sullivan (R-AK) – 60.5%
* Rep. Morgan McGarvey (D-KY) – 61.3%

Okay, now that’s a bit infuriating. McGarvey is a 44-year-old lawyer who was first sworn into Congress on January 3, 2023. And he earned a 61.3% return on his stock picks the same year? If it walks like a duck…

* Rep. Pete Sessions (R-TX) – 63.3%
* Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) – 65.5%

As we mentioned above, Pelosi is the one in Congress who is always suspected of insider trading, due to the amazing luck of the stock picks that her husband, Hammer Time Paul, makes. But Nancy and Hammer Time are like amateurs compared to the rest of this list. Check this out.

* Sen. Richard Blumenthal (D-NY) – 68.1%
* Rep. John Rutherford (R-FL) – 69.1%
* Sen. Ron Wyden (D-OR) – 78.5%
* Rep. Seth Moulton (D-MA) – 80%
* Rep. David Rouzer (R-NC) – 105.6%
* Rep. Garret Graves (R-LA) – 107.6%
* Rep. Mark Green (R-TN) – 122.2%
* Rep. Brian Higgins (D-NY) – 238.9%

Rep. Higgins nearly outperformed the S&P500 by 1,000% in 2023. He has a master’s degree in public administration from Harvard and he has never had a private sector job or owned a business. But he sure can pick stocks, apparently!

There are obviously a few bad apples in the Republican Party on this list, but the problem with Congress is much more pervasive than this looks. Unusual Whales, which compiled the stock returns of every Member of Congress for 2023, found that Democrats are getting much, much richer than Republicans.

While the S&P500 gained a 24.8% return in 2023, the average growth for all Republican stock-pickers, skewed by some of the whales listed above, was 17.9%. They outperformed the best mutual funds but didn’t outperform the S&P500.

The average return for all Democrats’ stock picks in 2023 was 31.1%

A handful of Republicans in Congress appear to be engaged in insider trading. And almost EVERY Democrat is certainly engaged in insider trading.

It’s time to ban all Members of Congress from owning stocks while they are in office and impose a two-year moratorium on them purchasing stocks after they leave office. Have you ever met a Representative or Senator in person? They’re just not that impressive in terms of intelligence. There’s no possible way that this is luck, random chance, or skill. These people are engaged in insider trading, which actually serves as a form of bribery, and it needs to be stopped.


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