You may not have noticed it, since the celebrations have been so low-key and muted this year, but it is our new national holiday of Pride Month right now! Joe Biden had a topless trans activist at the White House the other day while plastering rainbows all over the place. Bud Light, Target and Kohl’s have celebrated Pride so much that they’ve lost a collective $28.7 billion in market cap since April. And then an Elizabeth Warren donor got arrested for having sex with his dog!
We realize that this story is extremely low hanging fruit, but with the way that they’re shoving the endless rainbow waves down normal people’s throats this month, we just couldn’t resist.
64-year-old Themis Matsoukas is presumably a very smart man. He’s a professor of chemical engineering at Penn State University.
Matsoukas is a longtime Democrat Party donor. In 2004, he donated to John Kerry’s presidential campaign. He donated to Hillary Clinton in 2016, and Elizabeth Warren in 2020. He’s also made a ton of donations to ActBlue, the money laundering software company used by every congressional Democrat.
A search of his donation records shows that Matsoukas has never sent a single donation to any Republican candidate.
He also appears to be unaware that law enforcement sets up cameras in the parking lots of state parks these days.
The cameras are intended to watch out for acts of theft in park visitors’ vehicles, but the person monitoring the cameras the other day got an eyeful. According to WTAJ news, Themis Matsoukas took his clothes off in the parking lot while out for a walk with his dog.
Unless you have a really strong stomach, you may want to skip this next part. Because we’re totally going to go there. We can’t help it, because we love laughing at the Democrat Party and what a bunch of freaks and weirdoes and pervs they are. But this is really gross.
We’re serious. Skip over this next section if you need to.
WTAJ reports that Themis Matsoukas then began rubbing his chest and masturbating while recording himself on his iPad in the parking lot. It must have been a really special moment that he wanted to remember forever! The professor of chemical engineering and proud Elizabeth Warren donor then grabbed the leash and forced his poor doggie to lick his butt.
We warned you.
Professor Matsoukas has been charged with a laundry list of crimes, including public lewdness, indecent exposure, sexual intercourse with an animal, cruelty to animals, and disorderly conduct.
Media outlets that reported on Professor Matsoukas’ escapades avoided telling their viewers his political affiliation. It didn’t fool anyone, though. Matsoukas now joins a long list of Democrat freaks and weirdoes who are always getting caught in the weirdest scandals.
Former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer used to stuff his Russian hooker in a suitcase to sneak her into his condo without anyone noticing. Former New York Attorney General Eric Schneidermann was caught choking and beating his mistress while calling her his “brown slave.” Bill Clinton used Monica Lewinsky for a humidor, and then Jake Tapper of CNN dated her. And who could forget our buddy Adam Schiff’s alleged trips to the notorious gay drug den of Hillary Clinton donor and convicted serial killer Ed Buck!
The list just goes on and on.
It wasn’t even the regular cops that tracked down Professor Matsoukas after the doggie incident, which makes the story even funnier. He was tracked down and arrested for bestiality by park rangers from the Pennsylvania Department of Conservation and Natural Resources (DCNR). The rangers obviously found this story too hilarious to pass it on to the local police!
He panicked when they started asking him about molesting the doggie and told the rangers, “I do it to blow off steam.” As he was being questioned, the rangers noted that Matsoukas started to become increasingly panicked.
“What do I have to do to get you to shoot me?” he asked. “I need to die.”
What’s his problem anyway? It’s Pride Month! It’s supposed to be a celebration where we are totally Proud of all the deviants in our society. As of this writing, no news outlet has asked Elizabeth Warren for a comment about her doggie-molesting donor. We’ll keep you posted!